Couples
Relationships are one of the most important and influential parts of our lives. They can bring us support, joy, excitement, connection, and even pain. When couples find themselves struggling, it is often related to themes of closeness/connection, respect/recognition, or even power/control. Couples may find themselves struggling to communicate and connect with their partners, experience a lack of passion and romance, or difficulty managing life struggles and conflict as a team.
Relationships naturally move through different stages. Each stage is unique and brings various benefits and challenges. Couples therapy/marriage counseling/premarital counseling can be an opportunity for couples to create the relationship they desire. At R & S Health Initiative, we use research-based couples therapy approaches, such as Gottman Method and EFT, to help individuals gain new insights and resources for their relationship.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples is a researched-based approach developed in the mid-80’s by clinical psychologist Sue Johnson. EFT works by mediating the threat triggered by emotional disconnection, bringing us back to a safe, secure place where we can begin to feel connected and present with our partners.
As humans, we are biologically hardwired for connection. When that connection is threatened, our bodies experience this as a threat to survival. Deep within our brains, the amygdala triggers our body’s primary protective mechanism: our fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response. Emotional disconnection can be experienced as a threat to the survival of our relationship. This threat, whether real or perceived, is painful, and it’s visceral.
A strong emotional connection to our partner forms the core of our romantic relationships. It speaks to how we communicate, how we work as a team, promote our values, connect intimately, enjoy our sexuality as a couple and our time together. And yet, with life and work stressors and families and cultural pressures, so many partnerships begin to feel emotionally and sexually disconnected. Couples often come to Relational & Sexual Health Initiative struggling with how to communicate and connect with one another. They may notice increased arguments or getting stuck repeating a similar disagreement again and again, or noticing they operate more like roommates, missing the connection and pleasure in their relationship.
EFT is proven as one of the most effective scientifically proven methods of couple therapy. The Journal of Clinical Psychology has published empirical research studies that have found 75% of couples who completed EFT counseling experienced decreased relational distress, while 90% of all couples marked a significant improvement in relationship satisfaction.
At R & S Health Initiative, we help you to identify the repetitive patterns that keep your relationship stuck. Behind the arguments, we are often protesting the disconnection we feel and asking, “Are you there for me?” “Can I count on you?” “Do you need me?” “Do I matter to you?” Together, you’ll navigate these questions to build a renewed and stronger relationship with increased connection and intimacy.
Gottman Method Couples Therapy
Developed by leading psychologists and researchers John & Julie Gottman, the Gottman Method is an evidence-based approach that consists of both couples therapy and education for partners looking for positive change in their relationships. The Gottman model identifies primary behaviors most likely to lead to divorce and can predict divorce rates for couples with up to 94% accuracy. Working through the Gottman Method with your therapist, partners can learn to practice behaviors needed for long-lasting, stable relationships.
Beginning with a joint couples therapy session, the program follows with an in-depth assessment that touches on all levels of a couple’s foundational basis. The assessment includes a questionnaire surrounding commitment, values, trust, conflict, friendship, intimacy, and many other areas that may be important to you and your partner.
Once completed, your therapist will perform a detailed review of each partner’s individual assessment, scoring both strengths and areas of growth for your relationship to provide detailed and specific recommendations for improved relationship satisfaction. The Gottman Method process provides you and your partner with behavioral interventions and hands-on tools and resources that help with building improved communication, increased friendship and intimacy, and effective conflict management.
The Gottman Method Video:
